Making Great First Impressions

Hello Everyone!

Ever wonder why some people just seem to be able to make great impressions on others while others don’t?  Ever struggle to make a great first impression yourself?

I have been thinking about this topic for a while now and decided that it was time to step up on my soap box.  I firmly believe that we all need to know how to sell in order to make great first impressions.  Whether we are going for a job interview (selling ourselves), out on a date (selling ourselves), leading an organization (selling vision and ourselves), or selling a product or service which means we need to know how to sell (ourselves), etc. 

No matter what we are doing, we are selling ourselves as the best option for those around us.  We share stories, build friendships, engage with coworkers etc. all of the time.  Some people do this really well and some unfortunately do not.  This is not simply determined if you are an introvert, or an extrovert to determine if you will do this well.  What I am saying is that some just don’t sell themselves well enough.

There are three questions everyone asks at every interaction and they are as follows:

Do I like you? 

Do I trust you? 

How can you help me?

In seven seconds, a perception is formed about the other person based off these three questions.  Now there are so many aspects to how one can affect those three questions, that it is key that we know how to sell and why these three questions are affected.  Learning the sales process if even just for only buying decision 1, we are definitely on solid footing to move forward with other people.

How we are dressed, what environment we are in, our posture, our speech patterns, and many more aspects affect how people form their decisions about us.  Have you ever heard the phrase. “we only get one chance to make a first impression?”   This is because once someone makes that impression about us, it is extremely hard to change.    

The sales process is the key to mastering the art of first impressions, building rapport, and likeability.  Once we master the first buying decision of the sales process, we can build rapport with those around us faster!  This will enable us to make great first impressions, obtain engagement from those around us, and create stronger relationships.

Wouldn’t it be nice to know how to sell and build relationships to make our lives better?

If you’d like to learn the sales process and how to gain influence, I have launched my online courses.  It will enable you to master sales, implement the simple to use process, and become a top performer as well as how to build great levels of trust quickly.

Below are the two links to my online trainings to help you build rapport and influence with others. Both can be completed at your own pace and in the comfort of wherever you have a an internet connection.

The Sales Process Uncovered

Trustworthy

Have a great week!

Sincerely,

Kevin Sidebottom

“Businesses wonder why the majority of their sales teams struggle at winning profitable business.  I teach your sales team to walk with the customer through the five buying decisions, and in the correct order to generate more sales with high margins!”

www.kevinsidebottom.com

How to build trust with employees continued. ..

Last week we talked about why leaders need to focus on building trust with their employees if they want to move forward, have engagement, and a good culture. 

If you did not have a chance, go back and read last week’s blog on why we as leaders need to make sure we build relationships with our employees if we want to move forward faster with them. 

On to why we need to think like sales professionals if we want to gain influence with our employees. Sales professionals are trained to gain influence and how to build relational collateral with people.  I like to think of influence and relational collateral as a bank account.  Consistent deposits over time gains great levels of influence.  Constant withdrawls without deposits results in a bad relationship.

People will not buy from people they do not know, like, and trust.  If we want employees to buy in to what we are wanting to do, then we need to make sure we are focused on them.

You may be wondering how we focus in correctly.  It’s actually pretty simple and starts with three questions that the employee is asking about their leaders.

Do I like you?

Do I trust you?

How can you help me?

These three questions seem very selfish right?  We all go into this thought process every time we meet another individual.  It is hardwired into our brains for survival.  When mankind was hunting and farming with their community they needed to know if they could also trust those around them.  No one really wanted to get eaten by a saber toothed tiger right? 

As a leader we need to be outward focused so we need to narrow in on these three questions and how we can answer them well for each and every employee that reports to us.  If we can’t answer any of these questions, then we will not gain influence and engagement from our employees. 

The next question you are probably are asking as you read this is how do we answer these three questions?  We need to sit down and ask questions of the employees.  That’s right, we need to be asking questions to understand our employees.  People want to be understood and known.  How do leaders do that?  They ask questions. 

Three main types of questions:  Situational, Issues, and Ramifications kind of questions.

We need to understand where our employees are at, what issues they are facing, and what are the ramifications if those issues are not resolved.  That is why when meeting with employees we should be using the same CRM that we use for our customers.  We should be constantly learning about our employees.  Not to leverage them, but to know them and their situation.  By knowing where they are and what they are struggling with we will be able to help with solutions.  By doing this we build influence and engagement as a biproduct. 

If we do not and simply focus on getting a job done, we will see turn over, lack of engagement, and slow downs in work which end up driving higher costs eroding our profits.  It is to our benefit if we take time to understand our employees and learn about them to help them.  If we do so, we will be rewarded with what Dave Ramsey says, “They will charge the pits of hell with a water pistol for us,” if we show employees we care about them.

Have a great day!

Sincerely,

Kevin Sidebottom

“Businesses wonder why the majority of their sales teams struggle at winning profitable business.  I teach your sales team to walk with the customer through the five buying decisions, and in the correct order to generate more sales with high margins!”

www.kevinsidebottom.com

How To Build Trust With Your Employees

Are you new to an organization and need to get your team to follow you?  Have you recently been promoted and your current reports were recently your peers?  Do you have friends that now report to you?

When we take over a new role and have people reporting to us, we can’t simply believe they should follow us because of our position.  Far too often people in positions fall back on this stance, I’m in the leadership position so everyone on the team must respect and follow my lead.  Expecting people to follow us because of a title is not true leadership.  If we want people to follow us we need to reframe our minds to be one of a servant leader.

That sounds very contradictory doesn’t it.  A leader that serves.  Shouldn’t it be the other way around?  Our culture would want us to think that way, but the best way to lead is to focus on others.  We need to serve them well as their leader. 

To serve the team we first need to make sure that we are building trust with the team.  In order to move forward with others then they first have to know, like, and trust us.  If they don’t like and trust us, then we will have a slow lonely walk.  In business today it is fast paced that if we do not have trust then we are going to be passed by the competition.

How do we build trust fast is what I am often asked when talking to leadership teams.  We need to first put value on each person.  Not for them as employees, but as individuals.  Each person is unique and has unique gifts to help the team.  We need to understand this and learn about our team members, not just to leverage their gifts, but to make them are known and valued. Just think of a team in surgery, each of them has specific gifts that will help them save a life. We need to focus on finding out each individuals gifts and show them they are valued.

By focusing on individuals, we start to learn about them just like a sales person should be learning about the customer.  If we treat each individual as a customer, we start reframing our minds to thinking about how we can serve them well.  We immediately kick into building rapport and trust.  That’s what good sales professionals do best.  They build relationships.  At the core of any relationship is trust. 

You may be asking yourself, what if I’m not a sales person.  How do I do this?  Spoiler alert, we are all sales people.  Whether we have been on an interview, first date (interview), volunteering, parent, etc we are selling ourselves to others as a great option.  We are all selling something whether it is ourselves, or ideas, or our passion to help people be their best selves. 

Sales really is not that hard.  I was an introverted engineer when I started in sales.  It does not get much more difficult than that.  I like my alone time and I am a 1’s and 0’s black and white kind of person.  I still have thrived in sales because I focus on helping people get to a better place.  If we are in a leadership position, we can thrive as by putting on our sales hat and building trust with those that report to us.   Next week I’ll walk through the first buying decision in sales and how leaders can adapt that to building trust and relationships with those that report to them.

For now, sit back and think of a few relationships that could be improved by thinking like a sales person.  Not to sell them something, but how you can serve them and help them get to a better place.

Have a great day!

Sincerely,

Kevin Sidebottom

“Businesses wonder why the majority of their sales teams struggle at winning profitable business.  I teach your sales team to walk with the customer through the five buying decisions, and in the correct order to generate more sales with high margins!”

www.kevinsidebottom.com

Why Should They Trust Us?

Today we get into the second question that employees are asking themselves when speaking to to leadership.  Do I trust you? 

That is a huge question that if answered No, can stop engagement in its tracks.  If the employees do not trust the leadership then the organization is just going to be stagnant.  Now if you have ever walked by a stagnant pool or water, what did you notice?  There was likely a not so pleasant smell and algae growing on the top of the water.  Would we want our organizations to become stagnant? 

I have spent the majority of my career studying why people buy products and services as well as why people buy into leadership.  Being that I was an engineer there had to be an equation to the solution.  Magic was also not going to be the answer.  What I found is that when people use humor, are upfront, and show empathy towards others.  That is when people really start to open up and trust.

I’ve had a manager that had issues gaining trust.  This manager would openly tell anyone he first met within the first few minutes about his Christianity, but his actions would contradict what he would say he stands for.  He was explosive to be around and would demand you follow his view points.  If you challenged his view points, watch out!

This kind of behavior erodes trust the same as lying to others.  Trust is crucial for any kind of growth individuals 

So how can we grow trust fast?  Here are four principals that will help us grow trust with individuals.

1.     Social Proof

2.     Heart of a teacher

3.     Open and honest communication

4.     Encourage others to hold the microscope

Social proof is using a mutual connection between the someone else and yourself.  So many people like Dr. Oz, Dr. Phil, music artists, etc would see huge followings after being on the Oprah show.  Once they leveraged that connection, they were considered the go to expert.  Now we can’t all get on the Oprah channel, but we can leverage anyone that we know who knows us well that could reach out on our behalf. 

Having a heart of a teacher is offering help to the others get to a better place even if it does not benefit ourselves initially.  Teaching to give free knowledge for the heart of helping others is something that is lacking in today’s culture.  People tend to only want to help if they will receive something in return in that transaction.  If we want to gain trust, we have to have a heart of a teacher to help others. Not for what we will gain, but to help.  Zig Ziglar stated, that we will get all we want out of life, if we help enough other people get what they want.  I love that concept!

Open and honest communication means reaching out when we see something bad coming, but also making sure that others are aware and that we have their back.  Making sure that they are communicated to in a personal level is key.  Pick up the phone when we can instead of just sending an email.  This is something that I still struggle with sometimes when I am busy, but what I have learned is making sure I communicate is key.  Keep in mind the written word it taken negative most times when someone reads it.  Most of communication is nonverbal, posture, tone of voice, etc.  An email does not have the same impact as a verbal, or in person conversation.

The last key thing to do is encouraging others to hold the microscope.  No one is perfect so we should stop thinking we are.  We should stop judging others by their actions and want ourselves to be judged by our intent.  We should give others the opportunity to speak life into areas that we may have blind spots to.

There you have it. Four ways to grow trust fast.  SHOE… We need to have our shoes on if we plan to walk the talk :)

Have a great day!

Sincerely,

Kevin Sidebottom

“Businesses wonder why the majority of their sales teams struggle at winning profitable business.  I teach your sales team to walk with the customer through the five buying decisions, and in the correct order to generate more sales with high margins!”

www.kevinsidebottom.com

Building Trust With The "R" Word

Today, let’s talk about the second variable in building trust.  It’s Reliability.  How reliable are you?  When you say you’ll do something will you do it?  Will you do it to the best of your ability?  Do you forget to do it?  Will you do the right thing when no one is looking?   Do you think it is that big of a deal to be reliable?

It's a BIG DEAL!!!  Trust is won or lost by your actions, not just your words. 

I remember when I was younger, my father telling me to always do what you say you are going to do.  Do not waiver.  He also stated to do the right thing if everyone is watching and when no one is watching.  Don’t tell me, show me is the slogan I have heard all my life from my father.

I remember when I first met my wife’s parents.  We were up at their cottage grilling steaks and I was assisting my future father-in-law.  I told him that I usually every spring season the grill grates after the first steaks have been cooked by applying foil to the top of the grates and turning the heat up high while I ate and then it would bake in all the flavor.

What I didn’t know is that his grill grates on his expensive grill were actually anodized aluminum and not steel… 

Did you know when you crank up the heat and use foil that reflects the heat back into the grates that are anodized aluminum, they actually can’t take that much heat and melt and then break in half?  Yep, it was an awesome first experience… 

I told him that I would replace them even though my future father-in-law said don’t worry about it.  The next day I was on the phone with the grill manufacturer ordering the new grates.  I was originally going to order just two, but they informed me that they had two different sizes in that grill…. so, I ordered a complete set.  Did you know that anodized aluminum grates cost more than any grill I have ever bought?  Yep that’s right almost $300 for grates.

That weekend was the most expensive steak dinner I have ever had, but by doing the right thing and doing what I said I was going to do our relationship has grown and he has put a great deal of trust in me.  He knows that if I say I will do something that I will get it done. 

When we interact with our teams, customers, family, or friends we need to make it a constant effort to be reliable.  Without being reliable it is almost impossible to have a trusting relationship.  Especially when we are first getting to know others.

Here are a few things I do to make sure I follow through:

List it and do it – As you can see from the picture of this blog, I love to utilize post-it notes for my action items.  I will literally list out something I need to do and stick it to my wallet when I leave so I do not forget what I set out to do.  Some people use an app, but I am low tech.  A side note is that when people cross things off list they feel good and empowered.  If you are someone that keeps forgetting to do things, then maybe making a list and keeping it with you as a reminder might be a good tool.

Action It – I am bombarded with requests regularly and if I set something to the side I tend to forget about it, so I make sure I do it right away if I can.  CEO’s have utilized this method of acting right away of forgetting it.  Emails are a way they sort through action items to either take action right away, or throw it in the recycle bin.

Delegate it – If you are unable to do something and someone else is better equipped to handle the item then delegate it.  John Maxwell has endorsed this idea of delegate to elevate.  My wife and I set up weekly meetings to look at things that need to be done and delegate things that each other can do.  It allows us to work more efficiently, communicate effectively, and flow in our strengths.

L.A.D. are three helpful options that I we can all utilize to make sure we are reliable.

Is there a time that pops in the back of your mind where someone else has fallen short being reliable?  How did it make you feel?  Did you lose a little trust in that person? 

I know I will fall short sometimes, but I make it my best effort to do what I say I am going to do and if I am going to come in short I communicate the situation and try to better the situation to the best of my ability.  We need trust in order to keep moving forward with others.  We need to focus on how we can make sure we are doing what we say we will do and apologize to anyone that we may have fallen short with. 

Being reliable is essential in building trust.

Have a great day!

Sincerely,

Kevin Sidebottom

“Businesses wonder why the majority of their sales teams struggle at winning profitable business.  I teach your sales team to walk with the customer through the five buying decisions, and in the correct order to generate more sales with high margins!”

www.kevinsidebottom.com

Proximity, How It Will Help You Win with Customers

Have you ever noticed how you react when you are in a crowded space in comparison to walking in a nearly empty mall? 

Have you ever felt uncomfortable with others crowding your space?

There is this principal that depending how close you are to others the more trust is needed.  It is called Proximecs.  This principal basically defines why at different proximity with others we need different levels of trust.  The closer we are to another person the more trust we must have, or we will become uneasy.  There is a reason why stadiums sell out so easily for sporting events, coffee shops have people littered all over working on their Macbooks, and why people will wait for hours on hot summer days in lines for the best roller coasters striking up conversations with strangers.

 The distances breakdown like this:

Public Distance – 12.1’ +

Social Distance – 4.1’- 12’

Personal Distance 1.6’- 4’

Intimate Distance < 1.5’

The most fun and engaging interactions in our lives occur in social and personal distances.  The closer we get to others the more powerful the emotion can be shared during thrilling experiences.  Ever had an experience at a sporting event where you were slapping hands with some unknown individuals celebrating a score seemingly without thought about if they washed their hands or not?  We are wired to have more emotional significance to others we are in close proximity to.  Our bodies actually crave this connection to be understood and these interactions are a way to make that connection.

When working with customers it is extremely hard for us to get in front of them with emails, literature, billboards, etc.  We need to get in touch with them on a closer level.  This means sales professionals need to be in front of customers often.  This is also why deeper relationships are made outside of the office i.e. golfing, sporting events, hands on training, etc.  There isn’t a barrier between us and the customer like that of a desk, or board room table.  Their guard is lowered and in most cases are more willing to share more details that will enable you to help serve them. 

Now that we are in close proximities with the customer and trust is psychologically given as we are in close proximity, deeper discussions can happen and relationships formed.  Have you ever had a customer out at lunch share some deep dark secret about the organization just to vent?

Work at meeting with the customer if you want to gain more business with your customers. 

Warning!

Keep in mind that the intimate level should be those you should be giving intimate affection to like that of family and spouses.  Doing that with customers is just awkward outside of a casual hug when a bond has been made to wish each other well before, or after a meeting.

P.S. the picture associated with this blog will help you understand visually the distances a little better.

Have a great week!

Sincerely,

Kevin Sidebottom

www.kevinsidebottom.com